Episode 5- Low Notes

In my search to find a bassist, I've come across some real characters. I can laugh at it now, but spending 2 hours in the jam room with such guys was far from exciting. On one such occasion, I booked a jam room as my vocalist and I were to audition a bassist. The bassist entered, he was tall as a door and wide as a cupboard. He looked the part, now the important question - Can he play?

I asked the fellow to take a seat and listen to the OC we were to play. He replied haughtily, “I’m ok on my feet. You play! I’ll pick up.” Well, so we played our song and I watched him, he just stood there with his bass dangling around his neck. After the song was over, he looked at me and said, “Oh, this may take a while, I’ll sit down and think of something to play.” So he kept thinking and thinking and thinking… after an excruciatingly painful wait, he said, “ I've come up with something really awesome, you gonna dig it!” And then he played me my own guitar lines. I glanced at the singer, thinking where the hell on earth she had found this fellow. I explained, very slowly; to the bassist that he should play something parallel to the guitar parts and not simply copy my melody lines. He looked at me like a confused ox and bellowed, “You are playing all the wrong parts! Why don’t you come up with something new?” At that moment I realized it would be hopeless to argue with him. According to him, accompanying a guitarist meant stealing the guitar parts and then telling the guitarist to find something else to play.

Time dragged on. The vocalist and I rehearsed some old songs we had done and practiced two new ones while the bassist sat and wondered. He got up only when it was time to leave. While leaving he said, “Lemme know when the next jam is.” Well there was no next time; perhaps the sight of two PYTs had unnerved him. Such things happen!!!